Healing from Church Hurt

Is it possible to recover from being hurt by the church? In short, the answer is yes - the Lord has the power to heal all wounds. To elaborate further, allow me to share my personal experience.

At some stage in our lives, we will all encounter emotional pain from experiences within the church. This hurt may stem from lingering pride, leading to feelings of offense. Alternatively, it could be a manifestation of the enemy's attempt to undermine our sense of identity or purpose. Recently, I received healing from past church-related wounds. It wasn't until I opened up about it that I realized the profound impact it had on me. Through sharing, I came to understand that the individual who caused me pain was unwittingly being used to challenge my calling.

In the past, I have experienced hurt from fellow church members, but as I drew nearer to the Lord and developed humility, I realized that my feelings were simply due to offense or wounded pride. However, the most recent incident affected me deeply, and I couldn't understand why. You see, God had called me to deepen my connection with Him. As I followed His guidance, I found myself outgrowing the church my family and I attended. The Lord was leading me towards a new spiritual path where we could continue to flourish. Yet, when I attempted to make this transition, the enemy attempted to thwart my progress.

Key individuals in my former church, as well as my own family, were involved. What affected me the most were the remarks made by someone I trusted and viewed as a mentor, suggesting that I was causing harm to my family by uprooting them and insinuating that my role in worship at the new church would not be as significant as it was before. Despite these words lingering in my mind, I decided to transition to a different church. It made me act out of fear being a mother and I didn't even want to serve at all at the new church! However, the Lord had other plans.

Healing from Church Hurt

It didn't take long for me to notice the positive development of my children at the new church. My son expressed that he had discovered his community, even finding a "wing man" in the process. Similarly, my daughter swiftly formed friendships at the kids' church and experienced significant spiritual growth. I also established a strong bond with the women's pastor, who became a dear mentor to me. As a result, my relationship with the Lord reached new heights that I had never imagined before.

After settling into the new church for about a year, one of the elders unexpectedly approached me with an invitation to join the worship team. This offer caught me off guard, especially considering that he himself is a member of the team. I mentioned that I needed some time to pray about it. Interestingly, it seems that his wife may have mentioned my experience as a worship leader, a topic we discussed during a women's retreat where we were paired together by the Lord. Was it mere coincidence or a "God-cidence"? In any case, to cut a long story short, following my prayers, I accepted the offer, and he facilitated my introduction to the worship pastor. We had a meeting, prayed about it, and a month later, I officially became part of the worship team.

Those words still lingered in my heart, causing me pain. The enemy took pleasure in deceiving me with his lies about this pain. I often doubted my abilities as a mother and even questioned my worthiness to lead worship. Despite these inner battles, I continued to serve and guide my children.

During the previous week, I experienced healing and deliverance from the Lord, and in that process, I gained insight into two important truths: individuals, regardless of their church roles, may act based on their own emotional wounds, and they can also be "calling killers". I found the strength to forgive the person who had caused me pain. It was a liberating feeling, as if a heavy weight had been lifted off my chest. I gained clarity on the situation, understanding both the motives behind the hurtful words and why they affected me so deeply. I have now let go of that pain. The healing I received was a result of my obedience and humility. Forgiveness is an act of obedience, as the Lord instructs us to forgive (Matthew 18:22). Humility is essential in not taking offense at others' actions and instead choosing to love them (Ephesians 4:2).

My intention in sharing this is to offer hope for your own healing, rather than to criticize anyone. We all have our flaws and make mistakes. It is through these challenges that we have the opportunity to spiritually grow with the guidance of the Lord. The choice lies with us - to be obedient to Him or to persist in believing the lies of the enemy. I can assure you, the freedom that follows is truly invaluable.

If you find yourself unable to handle this alone, consider contacting your pastor or a fellow Christian you trust. In my role as a Christian life coach, I am available to assist you in navigating through this situation. Feel free to schedule a free discovery call to discuss further and determine if my coaching aligns with your requirements.

In Christ,

Alejandra, Christian Life Coach